


I think we’re (almost definitely, yep we really are) alone now

by blackberry_jam



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Good siblings, Other, ben and Vanya go to the apocalypse with five, can you tell I have favourite characters?, like the whole thing, no ships it’s all platonic don’t worry, that’s the whole plot, this has so many plot holes and I’m sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:47:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24961054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackberry_jam/pseuds/blackberry_jam
Summary: Like every other night, their siblings were all acting normally.Well, as normally as a family of fucked up child superheroes could be.
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy & Ben Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves
Comments: 24
Kudos: 100





	I think we’re (almost definitely, yep we really are) alone now

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So welcome to this ridiculously long, one chapter fic, with a major plot hole, but shh, we can just pretend the moon just decided to fall out of the sky and destroy the earth.
> 
> This was a spur of the moment, spend all weekend doing this instead of my homework (oops), fic. It was super fun to write, though, so enjoy!
> 
> Leave a comment if you enjoyed/hated it, criticism is always appreciated.

They were only thirteen when Five set off the chain that would change their entire lives.

It was dinner time, like any other night, really.

Before dinner, they spent time scattered around the house, all on their own, because even though they all lived under the same roof, they didn’t really know each other.

When mum rang the bell, they all raced down the staircase, dressed in their crisp uniforms, skirts and pants ironed stiff, shiny black shoes and argyle sweaters, not saying a word to each other.

As they took their places at the table, the record in the background was playing, a monotone voice instructing on mountain climbing, or something just as practical.

They all stood behind their chairs, in silence, looking around at each other, shooting quick glances before looking back down.

Not long after, their father arrived, making his way behind his chair as their mother brought out plates, placing them in front of them. They all whispered quiet ‘thank you’s’ under their breath, their mother smiling back at them.

“Sit.” Their father commanded, his voice as stern as ever.

There was a horrible screeching, as all seven chairs were dragged along the wooden planks, their father wincing as he carefully pulled out his own.

They all sat, silently, picking up their forks and beginning to eat.

Like every other night, their siblings were all acting normally.

Well, as normally as a family of fucked up child superheroes could be.

Luther, as per usual, was making gooey eyes at Allison, sitting opposite him, as she returned them. Luther would never do anything to disobey their father, so even daring to look at her, was a new thing. Allison never had much time to bother about what their father thought, or anyone really, if someone said something she didn’t like she’d just rumour them, and make them forget.

Sitting beside Luther, which he wasn’t too happy about, Diego had one of his knives out, carving something into the table. Diego had recently entered what their mother had referred to as his, ‘rebellious phase’, which meant vandalism, sulking around the house, speaking as little as he could, in order to hide his stutter, and defying their father, to an extent, not so much that he’s receive severe punishment, though.

Next to Allison, sat Klaus, discreetly rolling his own cigarette out of his father's view. Not that their father would care about Klaus’ health, he’d only worry about the fate of his precious ‘umbrella academy’. Though they would never say it aloud, their fathers constant warnings of ‘not getting too close’ and ‘not caring about others well being’ drilled into their heads, they all worried about him. Their father’s tough and distant parenting, not to mention the stress they were under from the constant missions and controlling their powers, had begun to drive Klaus towards alcohol, and more specifically, drugs.

Ben was next, his head buried, like it so often was, in a book. He often read, to escape his reality, and to enter a world where people had simpler worries. It was almost comical, to him, to read about teenagers his age, fussing over finishing their homework and whether their crushes like them back, instead of spending most nights reliving memories, he’s covered in blood, back in the car after a mission, or worrying that the Horror, living inside his stomach, would break out and destroy him, or even worse, his siblings.

Five sat beside him, angrily stabbing out at the pieces of chicken in his plate. Staring down at the chipped porcelain, decorated with small flowers, an all to familiar scowl on his face. His brow was furrowed, and he was clearly puzzling over something. It was likely a tough maths problem, or something to do with his teleportation.

Vanya was sitting at the head of the table, staring down at her lap, her face mostly hidden behind her dark bangs. Vanya was always the quiet one, always left out of the few social interactions they had. None of the others really knew much about her, except for the fact that she played the violin and didn’t have powers. Therefore, she was deemed basically worthless, or so their father had taught them.

The dinner continued, uneventfully… at least for a few minutes.

Five stabbed his knife into the hardwood table, causing all his siblings to look up, with a jolt.

“I want to time travel.” He said, his teeth gritted and a look of determination on his face.

“You’re not ready.” His father said, glaring at Five before turning back to his plate.

“I am ready.” Five hissed. “I’ve been practicing my spatial jumps.”

As if to demonstrate, he pushed back his chair, standing up and blinking up to the opposite side of the table, to stand beside his father.

His father began a long winded explanation, something about acorns and time travel.

Five hissed, glancing back up the table, where Vanya shook her head vigorously at him.

He paused for a moment, as if fighting an internal battle, before turning on his heel and running out of the room, towards the front door.

Ben dropped his book onto the table, glancing at Vanya who had dropped her fork and was watching her brother race towards the exit.

The others didn’t react, instead continuing to eat their dinner.

Ben and Vanya shared a quick glance, before both pushing out their chairs, with a horrible squeal, and chasing after him, ignoring their father's shouts.

Their black school shoes scuffed along the wooden floorboards as they pushed open the front doors, spotting their brother halfway down the street and running after him.

“Five!” Vanya cried, as she fell behind Ben, not able to keep up due to her lack of training. “Five, wait!”

Ben knew they had to reach him, and quickly, before he teleported away, and they wouldn’t be able to get to him, if he ended up far away.

Five slowed down, slightly, looking over his shoulder, and coming to a stop, turning back around and shouting at them. “Go away! Go home!”

They were starting to attract odd looks from passerbys, muttering things like ‘aren’t they the umbrella academy?’, ‘who’s the girl?’ and ‘why are they in uniform?’

“No!” Ben cried, as he reached him, grabbing his arm to hold him in place. “You have to come as well.”

“We’re not leaving without you.” Vanya panted, as she grabbed Five’s other arm.

“Well, I’m not going back.” Five said, determinedly.

“What’re you going to do?” Ben scoffed. “We’re thirteen years old. You can’t just live on the street.”

“I’m not going to.” Five said, trying to pull his arms away from his siblings grips. “I’m going to time travel.”

“No, Five.” Vanya said, quickly. “You can’t.”

“Why not?” Five asked.

“Dad said so.” Six said, quickly.

“Screw dad!” Five cried, angrily. “I’m sick of him telling us what we can and can’t do.”

“But he’s our dad.” Vanya said, slowly.

“Who didn’t even name us!” Five cried. “Who forces us to kill people. Who won’t let you hang around with us because ‘you're ordinary’. Wake up and smell the roses, Vanya. He’s a piece of shit!”

Vanya’s mouth fell open, and she loosened her grip on his arm. Five took this opportunity to wrench his arm away, but she quickly grabbed it again.

“Come on.” She said, unhappily. “We’re going home.”

“No.” Five shouted. “I’m not going back.”

“You have to, Five.” Six said, pulling on his arm. “Come on.”

“No!” Five shouted again, and he took off running forwards, dragging them behind him.

There was a flash of blue and they went hurtling forwards through time.

Five continued to run, his stride not broken, as the autumn wind turned to spring, flowers sprouting in the cracks on the pavement, colourful stalls lining the footpath. Vanya and Ben stumbled after him, groaning, as they travelled through time.

“Stop, Five, please.” Vanya begged, as she pulled backwards on his hand. “We have to go back. Take us back!”

“No!” Five said, happily, as his face broke into a grin. “I knew I was ready! That’ll show him!”

They were off again, flashing forwards through time. As they opened their eyes again, the sunny springtime had turned into a chilly winter, with snowflakes falling around them. The street goers were bundled up in coats, and the three children shivered in the icy wind.

Vanya and Ben groaned again, their heads spinning as they stumbled along the footpath behind their brother.

“Okay, Five.” Ben said, shaking his head slightly. “Let’s go home now.”

Five shook his head, as he began to laugh. “But this is so fun!”

“It’s really not.” Vanya murmured, under her breath as they were pulled through time again.

When they landed next, the air was warm and they opened their eyes, expecting to be met with a summer scene, but were instead met with flames and rubble.

There wasn’t a single building left standing. They could only assume they were standing on the same street, but the telltale buildings were gone, reduced to a pile of dust and ash. There were small spot fires burning around everywhere, and the air was hot and smokey.

Vanya and Ben let go of their brother, glancing around in shock.

“Oh, no, no, no, no.” Five muttered, glancing around at the destruction.

“What happened?” Ben asked, glancing around.

“Shit!” Five swore, turning back and racing down the way they had come, Ben and Vanya at his heels.

They ran down the street, back to where their home once stood.

There was nothing there. The famous Umbrella Academy, reduced to dust and ash.

“Oh no.” Vanya murmured, as they stared at their house, that just a few minutes ago had been standing.

“Dad?” Ben called. “Allison? Klaus?”

“Diego?” Five continued, shouting at the top of his lungs. “Luther?”

There was no response.

Five spun around a few times, taking in his surroundings.

“It’s okay.” He said, reassuring his siblings as much as himself. “I can get us back. It’ll be fine.”

Ben and Vanya nodded, nervously. They weren’t sure if they believed him.

“Okay, just grab my arm, or something.” Five said, anxiously, as he paced back and forth.

Ben and Vanya nodded again, grabbing onto Five’s arms as he clenched his fists, a wave of blue rippling around them. They shut their eyes, tightly, preparing for the nauseating trip that was time travel.

It didn’t come.

Five opened his eyes again, dropping his fists and swearing under his breath.

“What’s wrong?” Vanya asked, dropping her hands by her sides again.

“It’s not working.” Five said, desperately.

“What do you mean?” Ben asked, fearfully.

“We’re stuck here!” Five screamed, whipping around to face his siblings. “And it’s all your fault.”

“How is it our fault?” Ben cried. “You're the one who wanted to time travel. We told you not to!”

“I wouldn’t have gotten stuck if it was just me!” Five countered, shouting into the wind. “You messed up my equations, I had it all worked out.”

“You were going to get yourself killed!” Vanya cried. “You didn’t have it all worked out, your plan was ‘blindly run into the future’!”

“You wouldn’t understand.” Five snarled. “You don’t have powers.”

“No fucking way, Five.” Vanya shot back, her eyes dark. “Gosh, I haven’t heard that one before.”

“No one asked you to be here!” Five yelled.

“No one asked you to run off.” Ben screamed back.

“No one asked you to follow me!” Five shouted.

“Well, we apologise for caring about you.” Vanya screamed.

“Just go away.” Five screamed. “I hate you, and I hate this whole fucking family. I don’t want you here!”

“Yeah, because I’d just love to be stuck in the apocalypse with you.” Ben shouted back.

Five froze. “Oh shit.”

“What?” Ben replied, crossing his arms over his chest in frustration.

“We’re stuck in the apocalypse.” Five said, slowly. “We’re all going to die.”

“What do you mean?” Vanya asked, her hands clenching at her sides.

“Look around, Vanya.” Five said. “Do you think we’re going to be able to survive this? We’re thirteen years old, for god's sake!”

“But…” Vanya said, slowly. “You’ve got superpowers.”

“Oh, great, Van.” Five said, exasperatedly. “Why didn’t I think of that? Broken time travel and tentacles are going to be of great use.”

“Sorry.” Vanya murmured.

Five shook his head. “No, shit, sorry, I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too.” Ben said, slowly, rubbing his arm.

“We have to work together if we want to survive.” Five said, grabbing both of his siblings shoulders. “Okay? No more fighting.”

Vanya and Ben both quickly nodded, repeating Five’s words. “No more fighting.”

Five started talking about survival methods, and Ben nodded along with him as Vanya turned to survey their surroundings.

She turned around, spotting something in the rubble. She made her way over, careful not to trip in her clunky shoes.

“Shit.” She swore, quietly as she realised what she was looking at, tears brimming in her eyes as she looked down. She quickly turned back around, calling to her brothers, her voice breaking. “Guys…”

They spun around to face her, climbing over the rubble to see what she was pointing at.

There was a body of a young woman. She was unknown to them, but something about her seemed… familiar, somehow.

Vanya knelt down, picking up her wrist and showing her brothers, tears trickling down her cheeks.

They both gasped, cries getting caught in their throats.

On her wrist was a small umbrella tattoo, mirroring the ones imprinted on the inside of their own wrists.

“Allison.” Five murmured, his voice breaking as his eyes began to water.

“Oh, god.” Ben said, quietly as he pointed to a pile of rubble laying on top of another body.

This one was Diego.

Then they found Klaus.

Then there was Luther.

Five squatted beside Luther’s body, noticing something clamped inside his hand. He leant towards, peeling back Luther’s cold, dead fingers and taking the object.

“What is it?” Ben asked, wiping his nose in his sleeve.

“A glass eye.” Five said, squinting at it in confusion.

“Why would Luther have a glass eye?” Vanya asked, her voice breaking as she said her brother's name.

“I… don’t know.” Five said, slowly.

“What do we do now?” Ben asked, quietly.

“Shelter.” Five said, his voice barely a whisper. “We have to find shelter.”

“But what about, you know.” Vanya said, her voice shaky, pointing towards their sibling’s bodies.

“There’s nothing we can do.” Ben said, slowly.

Five and Vanya nodded, sadly.

They began to pick their way through the rubble, avoiding sharp metal pipes and hearing the crunch of shattered glass under their polished shoes.

They walked in almost silence, along the street that their home once stood upon, searching for somewhere that was still standing, or at least more than just a pile of rubble.

The first place they stayed at was a service station.

It was at the very corner of their block, and Five and Ben could remember stopping for ice cream after a particularly successful mission, after Allison had rumoured him. The roof had mostly caved in, but there was still a bit of rusted tin, held up by a cracked pillar, sheltering one corner of the small building.

The outside was essentially destroyed, the glass had been smashed, in what they could only assume was an explosion of some kind. Similarly, the asphalt out the front was torn up, creating a gaping crater in the ground. They edged their way around it, stepping through the smashed glass sliding doors, small pieces of glass breaking under their feet.

There was a newspaper out the front, the words ‘a beautiful day’ splashed across the front page, the date printed neatly in the corner.

The world ended on the first of April, 2019, huh.

Five opened the casing, pulling out the newspaper and folding it carefully. He placed it into his blazer pocket, careful not to rip it.

As if in answer to his siblings confused faces, he shrugged.

“It might be useful.”

They trudged into the service station, sitting down behind the counter, under the tiny bit of roof that was still standing, careful not to cut their hands on the tiny shards of glass.

“What do we do, now?” Vanya asked, nervously pulling at a thread from her knee high socks.

“We’ll need food.” Five said, looking over the top of the counter cautiously. “We should get as much as we can carry.”

“Aren’t we staying here?” Ben asked.

Five bit back a sarcastic remark, his mantra of ‘no fighting’ still ringing through his head.

“No, there’s too much rubble, not enough shelter. We can eat and drink, and we’ll keep going.”

Vanya and Ben nodded, and they all stood up and crossed the small building, dodging fallen pillars and piles of metal.

“Only get things that won’t perish.” Five advised.

They collected cans of soup, beans and various meats, as well as dehydrated meals. They ignored the dairy products that had started to go off already in the thick heat, and instead found packets of biscuits, mostly smashed but still edible. Over in the fridges, there were bottles of water. They each carried as many as possible. They didn’t have bags, so they removed their blazers and sweaters, already dirty with grime and sweat, and wrapped everything up before slinging them over their shoulders and continuing on.

The air was still thick, hot and filled with smoke and ash. The three children crossed the wasteland, their shoes scuffed, socks at uneven lengths and ties loosened. Their faces were covered in a fine layer of dark ash, and their clothes were greyed and dirty.

They eventually arrived at what used to be the public library. They had only ever been a few times, on the nights that they managed to sneak out of the house and break into the, long closed, library. They never destroyed anything, though, only sat in the comfortable couches, books spread over their laps. They’d all been, as a family, but numbers Five, Six and Seven enjoyed it the most. Luther would grow antsy, worrying about their father finding out about their expeditions, and worried what his father would think of him, Number One, the leader, while Diego would sulk, something about ‘not liking any of them’ and ‘why am I even here?’ Allison and Klaus would race to the boxy computers, to look at magazine covers and new nail polish colours. Five would retract into the aisle where the maths and science books were, whilst Ben would look at the fiction section. Vanya didn’t really mind what she did, she was just happy to be included, happy that they hadn’t snuck out without her. She’d spent countless nights, in her bedroom, hearing her siblings hushed whispers as they snuck out of the house, and every night she had stayed in her uniform, sitting in the edge of her bed with her shoes tied up, just in case they didn’t forget about her, just in case they wanted her to come.

But now, there was only one of the once tall library walls left. The back wall was still standing, but the paint had faded and the wall was crumbling. The top of it looked as though something had smashed into it. There were discarded carts lying around, the metal dented and the wheels wonky. And the books, the books were lying scattered over the ground. Some would probably still be readable, although most were charred and ripped. The warm wind was blowing gently, scraps of paper flying around them.

“Is here going to be fine?” Vanya asked looking around at her brothers.

Five nodded. “For now, anyway.”

They all moved towards the back wall that was still standing, carefully placing the bundles of food on the dusty ground and falling down beside them, exhausted.

Ben dug out a drink bottle and they passed it between them, taking small sips at a time.

They sat in silence, backs against the crumbling wall, their shoulders pressed together, as they surveyed the damage.

It looked as though the world was on fire. As far as the eye could see, there was destruction and the air smelt like smoke, and death.

They were the only people left alive.

“What time is it?” Ben asked, suddenly.

“Why?” Five asked, laying his head back against the wall. “I don’t think time is important right now.”

“Isn’t your whole thing time travel?” Vanya asked, squinting at her brother.

“Yeah.” Five said, slowly turning to look at his sister. “But that’s kind of screwed, now.”

“Everything’s screwed.” Ben scowled. “We should be home, in bed.”

“Go home then.” Five scowled back.

“Wow, Five.” Vanya sighed. “Wish I’d thought of that.”

“You know what I mean.” Five said, pulling one of his knees up to his chest.

“I don’t.” Ben sighed, kicking out at a small nail.

Five only rolled his eyes in reply.

They fell back into silence, the only sounds were the crackling of flames and the wind, blowing gently through their hair.

“Do you think our funerals were cool?” Five asked.

Ben and Vanya sat up straighter, leaning forwards and staring at him, confusion all over their faces.

“Like, back in 2002.” Five prompted.

“What are you talking about?” Ben asked, squinting at his brother. “We’re not dead.”

Five sighed again. “But, I bet everyone thinks we are.”

“Why?” Vanya asked.

“Because we straight up disappeared.”

“But it’s only been a few hours.” Ben said, scrunching up his forehead.

“For us.” Five continued, frustration in his voice. “Everyone else's lives went on.”

Vanya and Ben blinked back at him, blankly.

Five groaned. “Do you not understand anything about time travel?”

“Well, believe it or not,” Vanya began. “It wasn’t one of my particular interests.”

Five groaned again, leaning forwards and picking up a piece of discarded metal. “Look here.”

He drew out a long line, in the gravelly ground.

“This is the timeline, okay?” Five explained, and Vanya and Ben both nodded.

He drew a short vertical line along the original one, labeling it with numbers. “And, this is 2002, where we just came from.”

Vanya and Ben nodded again.

He drew another marker. “And this is 2019, where we are now.”

More nods.

“So, whilst we skipped, straight from here…” He began to draw a long curved line connecting the two points. “to, here. Everyone else, Luther and Allison and Diego and Klaus and Dad, had to go through every single year, to reach 2019.”

Ben and Vanya still looked confused, but they smiled encouragingly at him.

Five groaned again, leaning back against the wall. “So, they would have been…” He was silent, performing quick calculations. “Thirty. And if we’d stayed, then we would have been thirty when we died, along with everyone else.”

“But, we didn’t stay, so we didn’t die.” Ben added.

Five nodded.

“So, you think we had funerals?” Vanya asked.

“Well, knowing dad he probably stuck up a memorial painting, told the press we’d died tragically and allowed our siblings one millisecond of grieving time, before putting them through some new form of torture.” Five said, dryly.

“I doubt I had a painting.” Vanya mused.

“Why not?” Ben asked.

“Ben.” Vanya said, looking at him sternly. “That was a stupid question.”

Ben sighed.

“Maybe the city mourned your ‘death’ though.” Vanya said, a small smile growing on her lips. “Do you reckon all the girls with love heart signs were crying?”

“Stooop!” Five groaned, nudging Vanya’s shoulder, playfully.

Vanya only giggled, Five’s complaint only encouraging her.

“Remember the one that said ‘you can teleport into my bedroom, Number Five’, with all the pink glitter?” Vanya giggled. “I bet she was really upset.”

Ben joined Vanya in peals of laughter as Five’s face heated up.

“Don’t you laugh, Ben.” Vanya grinned. “What about the one that said ‘I wouldn’t mind if The Horror—”

Ben, sensing where Vanya was going, leant over Five and slapped his hand over her mouth. “Nope.”

Vanya licked his hand.

Ben peeled his hand away, quickly, wiping his palm on Five’s shirt.

“Yuck.” Five said, pushing his hand away. “Don’t get me involved in your squabbling.”

“Okay, mum.” Vanya grinned, brushing a clump of dirt off her skirt.

“What do you think happened to Mum?” Ben asked. “Or Dad or Pogo?”

“Maybe they died earlier.” Five suggested.

Vanya hit his arm. “Don’t say that!”

“Well, not mum, obviously, but would you really be that upset if dad or Pogo kicked the bucket?” Five asked.

Vanya and Ben were silent, giving Five his answer.

“Knew it!” He cried, happily. “I was right!”

“It’s not really a great thing to be right about, though.” Ben said, kicking Five’s shoe.

“We’re in the apocalypse.” Five said. “Nothing’s ‘great’.”

They fell silent again.

“What do you think happened, anyway?” Vanya asked, breaking the eerie silence as she passed the plastic bottle to Five.

“Something bad.” Ben said, simply.

“Yeah, no shit.” Five muttered, rolling his eyes.

Ben rolls his eyes right back.

And even though they’re stuck in time, Vanya can’t help thinking that it could be worse. If she had to be stuck in the apocalypse, she’d probably pick her favourite brothers to be stuck with her.

  
  


They’ve been there for about a week, by the time Vanya runs out of her pills. She’d known it was going to happen, and forced herself to only take a pill when she really needed it, instead of twice daily, but when Vanya reached into her pocket, on the sixth of April, 2019, she found her pill box was empty. She swore, loudly, as she patted down her blazer pockets to make sure none had spilled out, searching for just one more.

Her cry was enough to make her brothers look up from where they were sitting. Living in such a quiet place, their ears had adjusted to the slightest sound, especially any human sounds.

The apocalypse was dangerous, and they all had an unspoken agreement that they didn’t leave each other's sights, unless saying something, and that shouting and screaming was always a bad sign.

“What is it?” Ben asked, snapping his head to where his sister was standing, her knee high socks pushed down around her ankles.

“Oh, uh, nothing, nothing that important anyway.” Vanya lied, tucking the tube back into her pockets, quickly, and making her way over to her brothers.

“Well, that’s a lie.” Ben said, staring at her indignantly.

“What? No, uh, no it’s not.” Vanya lied again.

“What is it?” Five asked. “Is it your pills?”

Vanya stared at him in shock for a minute before dropping to the ground beside them “How did you know that?”

“You’re fiddling with the container.” Five said. “I can hear you clicking the lid.”

Vanya groaned, putting her head in her hands.

“Have you run out?” Ben asked, worriedly.

Vanya nodded, her face ashen.

“What were they even for?” Five asked.

It didn’t take long for Vanya to realise that she couldn’t honestly answer that question.

“I-I don’t know.” She said, quietly. “Dad just said I had to take them. Maybe anxiety?”

“He didn’t tell you.” Five said, more of a statement than a question.

Vanya nodded, slowly. “What if he was drugging me, oh god.”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad.” Ben said, reassuringly, although both Vanya and Five could tell he wasn’t sure.

“What do I do?” Vanya asked, nervously.

“You’ll just have to ride it out.” Five said, plainly.

“Ride what out?” Vanya asked.

“Withdrawal symptoms.” Five said. “Headaches and the like.”

“Shit.” Vanya said, burying her head in her hands again. “Do we have any aspirin?”

“We can rob a chemist.” Ben said.

“It’s not theft.” Five said, quickly. “It’s survival skills.”

“It’s basically the same thing, anyway.” Ben said, rolling his eyes.

  
  


The next day, Vanya woke up with a throbbing headache. Unsurprisingly, Five was right. He’d love to hear that. She wondered briefly if this is what it was like to be stabbed in the head, probably by Diego and his throwing knives.

It was probably still early, although it’s difficult to tell, what with the absence of the moon, and all, because she could see Ben and Five still lying nearby, out of the corner of her. She shut her eyes, again, to dim the brightness of the ever shining sun.

Ben and Five woke up at some point, because she hears them whispering in hushed voices, but her head still hurts, so she goes back to sleep.

She wakes up again, and this time there’s someone sitting beside her. She doesn’t turn her head to look, though, because it still feels as though a train is smashing into her skull.

“Oh, hey, Van.” The person says.

It’s probably Ben.

“Do you want some water?”

Yep, definitely Ben.

“Please.” Vanya croaked, and felt a bottle being pressed against her lips. She takes a sip before laying her head back down.

“Head hurts.” She murmurs.

“Yeah, I know, I know.” Ben whispers. “But Five’s gone to get some aspirin.”

Normally she’d be worried about him going by himself, but she’s really tired so she just shuts her eyes and falls asleep again.

The next time she’s woken up, Five’s back and he’s holding a box of something, Vanya doesn’t really care, she just wants to go back to sleep, wants her headache to go away.

And he’s saying something, but Vanya doesn’t care because she’s tired.

But he won’t let her go to sleep again, not even when she hits his shoulder, the sudden movement making her head throb worse.

“Vanya, stop being an idiot.” He says, shaking the box in front of her face, and she can see what it is now, it’s headache pills.

So she sits up, slightly and dry swallows one of the pills, murmuring her thanks before dropping off to sleep again.

And when she wakes up next, her headache is gone. And it’s miraculous, she wants to shout it from the rooftops, except if she did the rooftop would probably collapse, and there’s no one here to hear her shout about it, anyway. Except her brothers, they’re still here.

She rolls over, opening her eyes and looking at them.

“Oh, good.” Five says, dryly, when he notices. “She’s not dead.”

She sits up slowly, flipping him the bird. Vanya would come up with a better retaliation, but she’s still pretty groggy, how many pills did she take?

“And as lovely as always.” Five mutters, turning back to his notebook. “I’ll have you know, that I braved my life to get you some aspirin.”

“And Ben, Ben’s life too.” Vanya mutters, as Ben hands her a drink bottle.

“What?” Five scoffs. “No, Ben stayed here.”

“You went by yourself?” Vanya asked, incredulously. “Five, what the hell?”

Five shrugs. “You were out for the count, and Ben stayed to make sure you didn’t die.”

“What if you’d died?” Vanya said. “Or gotten stuck under some rubble and suffocated? Or gotten lost, and starved, or—”

“I didn’t, though.” Five said, a familiar smirk on his face. “Why, does baby sister Vanya care about me?”

“First of all, we’re the exact same age, and you know the most about survival.” Vanya said, defensively. “Ben and I would probably die if you weren’t here.”

“We also wouldn’t be here, if he wasn’t here.” Ben added, tactfully.

“Oh, shove off.” Five snapped, tossing the notebook at him.

Ben grabbed the notebook, throwing it back to his brother before, turning back to Vanya. “But you’re feeling better, though now, aren’t you?”

Vanya nodded. “It must just be the pills.”

“Make sure you say something, if something else happens.” Five said.

Vanya nodded, meekly.

“What food do we have left?” Ben asked, changing the subject, to Vanya’s relief.

“Uh, 6 cans of soup, 2 packets of biscuits, 5 full water bottles, half a stick of cabana, 2 cans of vegetables, and one jar of peanut butter.” Five said, flicking through the notebook and glancing up.

They’d found a whole stack of notebooks, at the stationary store, maybe a half an hour's walk from where they had set up camp. There were three, still wrapped in their cling wrap, when they found them. All three of the notebooks were still in relatively good condition, well, for the apocalypse, anyway. They had one each, really, but they had different things in all of them.

In the purple notebook, the one still gripped in Five’s hand, they had the lists of the food they had left. The first few pages were full, lists scratched down the sides, lines drawn through each item as they ate it. They went through food pretty quickly, even through their strict rationing.

In the green notebook, Five had insisted they keep track of the day, so there were rows and rows of tallies, informing them, rather depressingly, how long they'd been stuck in this hellhole.

In the last notebook, with a thick black leather cover, Five scrawled countless equations, trying in vain to work out the perfect answer. The answer that would get them home.

“Why do we have peanut butter?” Vanya asked, scrunching up her nose.

“Because Five can’t help himself.” Ben cut in, quickly. “He was going to get marshmallows too, but the packaging was all melted.

Five scowled, looking down at the notebook in his lap, as Ben and Vanya began to giggle.

“You know what we actually need to do.” Five said, interrupting his siblings. “We should see if we can find new clothes.”

“Yes, please.” Vanya said, drawing out her words. “These uniforms are disgusting and dirty and just generally icky.”

“Add it to the list.” Ben said, grabbing the green notebook and tossing it to Five.

“What else is on the list?” Vanya asked, reaching for a drink bottle and taking a small sip before replacing the cap and putting it back.

Five flicked through the notebook, finding the last page and reading aloud. “Find more food, search the outskirts of town, check if that stream still exists, rob a chemist… we already did that, and anyway Ben, it doesn’t count as robbing if everyone’s everyone’s already dead.”

“Well, that’s cheery.” Vanya said, tucking her knee under her chin.

“Vanya, we’re in the apocalypse it’s not going to be cheery.”

Vanya just rolled her eyes in response.

“Should we get moving, then?” Five asks, standing up and tucking the three notebooks in his blazer pocket.

“It’s too hot, today.” Ben moans, not moving from his position on the floor.

“It’s this hot, everyday.” Five says, walking to fetch the red wagon they found a few days ago, one of the wheels is wonky, but it still works.

“Come on, Ben.” Vanya says, kicking her brother's shoe as she stands up. “Let’s go rob a clothing store.”

“It doesn’t count as theft!” Five called, as Ben and Vanya shared an eye roll.

  
  


The clothing store wasn’t too far away, although dragging the wagon with them took longer. Whatever caused the apocalypse must have had a special love for ‘Myer’ as the shop was hardly damaged. Apart from the typical destruction scene of,  
glass-smashed-walls-cracked-peeling-paint, the shop was in otherwise, okay condition.

They pulled the wagon through the smashed up glass windows, and glanced around the shop.

“It’s not too bad.” Five said, looking around.

“Oh, I don’t know.” Ben said, a glimmer of a smile on his face. “I really think the broken glass brings down the feng shui of this room.”

Five stared at him in disbelief, as Vanya started to join in.

“Oh, yes.” Vanya grinned. “I really think the designers would have done better if they hadn’t included all these dented pillars.

“You guys are idiots.” Five sighed, shaking his head.

“But, you love us, don’t you?” Ben asked, slinging his arm over his brother's shoulder.

Five grumbled, ducking out of the way of Ben’s arm.

“That means ‘yes’ in Five’s language.” Vanya smiled.

Five sighed, again. “Just find some practical clothes.”

“You’re no fun.” Vanya pouted.

“We’re in apocalypse it’s not supposed—”

“To be fun.” Vanya and Ben both finished, rolling their eyes at each other.

Five rolled his eyes back at them, as they moved towards the rows of clothes.

They were silent for a moment, as they looked through the rows and rows of coat hangers.

“Hey, guys!” Five called, and Ben and Vanya raced around the corner.

“Is something wrong?” Vanya asked, nervously. “Are you okay?”

Five looked up from where he was kneeling on the ground. “Huh, oh yeah, I’m fine.”

“Did you find something?” Ben asked.

“Yeah, look.” Five moved to the side, revealing a broken top half of a bald mannequin, wearing a dirty spotty shirt.

“A mannequin…” Vanya said, slowly.

Five nodded, enthusiastically.

“Alright.” Ben said. “Cool.”

“Her name’s Delores.” Five prompted.

“It’s just a mannequin.” Vanya said, carefully.

Five glared at both of them, before turning back to the mannequin and whispering something.

Ben and Vanya shared a look.

“Okay, well we’ll keep looking, I guess.” Vanya said, slowly, grabbing Ben’s arm and pulling him away.

“That’s not normal, right?” Ben whispered.

Vanya shook her head. “What do we do?”

“Get him to stop talking to it.” Ben said, finally.

“And how do we do that?” Vanya asked.

“Get him to talk to us.” Ben said.

“Talking isn’t really one of his strong points.” Vanya said.

“It’s either that or watch him go insane.” Ben shrugged.

  
  


When they finally arrived back at the camp, in thick boots, hiking pants and long sleeved shirts, Five was still carrying the mannequin.

“Hey, Five.” Vanya said, carefully. “How are you doing?”

“Hmm?” Five said, looking back at his sister. “Oh, yeah, fine. Why?”

“Oh, no reason.” Vanya said, kicking at a clump of dirt. “Just, checking in.”

“Are you okay?” Five asked. “Don’t have a headache or anything?”

“Oh, no.” Vanya said. “It’s just, you’ve been talking to, you know, a mannequin.”

Five hung his head, slightly, scratching at the back of his neck. He shrugged slightly. “Just kind of, you know, lonely.”

“Lonely?” Vanya asked, crossing her ankles as she leant against the wall. “I mean, yeah there’s only the three of us, but Ben and I are still here.”

“Yeah, but you and Ben are close, and you’re funny, and interesting and good at stuff.” Five said, quietly.

“Oh, no, Five.” Vanya said, sadly. “You’re funny too, and really smart, and we’d be lost here without you. And Ben and I, we’re no closer, than you and I or Ben and you.”

Five didn’t respond, instead looking down at the ground.

“And you're our brother.” Vanya continued. “So, you can’t go crazy and talk to mannequins, because you've gotta talk to us. And you’re going to get us home, I know it.”

Five nodded, looking up at his sister. “Okay.”

Vanya grinned, and leant over to hug him.

Five squirmed away.

“There’s the Five I know.” Vanya smiled.

And Ben came back around the corner, and came and stood back with his siblings.

“What’s for dinner?”

“Cold soup.” Five answered.

“Oh, my favourite.” Ben said, dryly.

  
  


It’s just a normal day when Vanya first thinks that something's wrong. She has a slight headache, but it’s not crippling, so she spends the day in the shade, her brothers sitting beside her, arguing about something.

“No, Five.” Ben was saying. “You can’t try and spatial jump, you know it doesn’t work.”

“Ben, it’s my power.” Five scowled. “I know what I can do.”

“No!” Ben argued. “You’ll probably get stuck somewhere else, and you’ll be by yourself, and then you’ll die.”

They were getting really loud.

“No.” Five said. “Spatial jumps aren’t like that.”

“Well, then what are they like?”

Too loud.

“I can’t get stuck in time again, I’ll just jump to that pile of rubble over there.”

“You’re going to need to be more specific.”

“Look, over there, no, that one there. Jesus, are you blind?”

Her ears were ringing.

“No. You’re not doing it. That’s final.”

Her head started to hurt.

“You’re not my mum! I can do whatever the hell I want. I could work out how to get back, and leave you here.”

She couldn’t hear anything else.

“You wouldn’t.”

She just wanted them to shut up!

“Wouldn’t I?”

“Shut up!” She screamed, and they snapped their heads towards her, just in time to see a shield-like wave ripple from her, knocking them back.

As quickly as it had appeared, it was gone, and they were left staring at each other, wide eyed.

“What the fuck was that?” Ben cried.

Vanya was panting, looking down at her hands.

“Does— Vanya, was, was that you?” Five asked.

Vanya shrugged, nervously. “I-I, don’t know. It just happened.”

“You’ve got powers.” Five said, pointing at his sister, before turning to Ben. “She’s got powers!”

“What? No, Five, don’t be stupid.” Vanya said, shaking her head. “I’m Number Seven.”

“How else do you explain that?” Five asked.

“It, uh, was just a heat wave?” Vanya tried.

Five shook his head again. “No, you’ve got powers.”

“But why hasn’t she had them before?” Ben asked, still looking confused.

Five was silent for a moment, thinking. Then he clicked his fingers, pointing at Vanya “It was the pills.”

“What?”

“The pills.” Five prompted “They stopped it.”

“But, why would dad want me to be ordinary?” Vanya asked.

Five shook his head. “I don’t know.”

“Well, what’s her power?” Ben asked, looking at Five.

Five looked at Vanya.

“I don’t know?”

“It was that wave-shield-thing.” Five said. “But, how did you do it.”

Vanya shut her eyes, thinking back. “Sound.”

“Sorry?”

“It was the sound.” Vanya said, excitedly. “You two were arguing, and it was too loud.”

“So, you turn sound into energy.” Five said. “That’s really cool!”

“But, still kind of useless.” Vanya sighed.

“It’s not useless.” Ben said, quickly. “It’d be a good defensive weapon.”

“I meant useless in the apocalypse.” Vanya said. “What am I going to knock out? Cockroaches? You?”

“Good point.” Ben said. “But it’s better than The Horror.”

“Or broken time travel.” Five added.

“If it’s broken, then why do you want to try again?” Ben asked, pointedly.

“What do you mean try again?” Vanya asked.

“Five wants to try and spatial jump again.” Ben said.

“No! Absolutely not!”

Five groaned.

  
  


Judging by the tally marks in the notebook, they were eighteen when the winter's started to get really bad.

The first few years were fine, as the fire’s continued to burn and the sun never set, the apocalypse was always hot.

They were immensely surprised to wake up to snow, one morning.

Vanya woke up first, to the feeling of cold, wetness, sleeping through her pant leg. Sitting up and blinking the sleep out of her eyes, she saw that it was snowing.

“What the hell?” She murmured, standing up quietly so as not to disturb her brothers.

Taking a few steps, she could see that the snow was falling, thick and fast, and had already begun to gather on the piles of rubble.

She turned back, kneeling beside Five and shaking him awake.

“What?” He groaned, groggily. “Go away.”

“Five, get up!” She sighed, still shaking him.

Five sat up reluctantly, pushing Vanya off him and looking up.

“Oh.” He said, upon seeing the snow. “Get Ben up.”

So Vanya does, kicking lightly at her brother's side to rouse him.

Ben sits up, as reluctantly as Five and they watch as the snow falls around them.

“We’re going to have to move.” Five groans, as the snow piles up around their feet. “We’ll freeze out here.”

“Where are we going to go?” Ben asked.

Five shrugged. “Somewhere still standing.”

That didn’t leave them many options.

It takes them a few hours to pack everything away, stacking it into the wagon and stuffing pockets.

They find the coats they took a few years ago, just in case, and out them on, although they’re of varying sizes, none of which fit correctly, and after double triple checking that they didn’t leave anything behind, not the half empty box of aspirin or the old newspaper, from their very first day, they head off.

It takes even longer to get through the rubble, with the snow falling. It gets worse and worse, until they can barely see what’s in front of them.

Five was walking at the front, dragging the wagon behind him, Vanya in the middle to help lift the wagon over any obstructions in the road. Ben was at the back, a stack of books in his arms.

“Five,” Ben called, from the back. “Do you actually know where we’re going?”

“Outskirts of town.” Five shouted back. “There might be something there.”

“Might be?” Vanya asked. “Isn’t there anywhere closer?”

“We can try.” Five said. “I think there used to be houses along this street.”

“Let’s check.” Ben agreed.

They changed direction, slightly, their heads still bowed against the fierce wind and snow.

Eventually, they found a trap door, built into some broken floorboards, that lead to a wine cellar.

Five jumped down, avoiding the cracked staircase, and glanced around. “It should be fine, for a little while, anyway.”

So they passed down the wagon, and the stack of books before jumping in and shutting the door behind them.

The small room was still cold, but without the chill of the wind, it was much more pleasant.

“And there’s still wine left.” Ben noted, as they began to unpack the cans of food into the shelves.

Five was standing on the opposite side of the room, looking at something.

“What have you got?” Vanya asked, wheeling the wagon to the corner of the room and unpacking the sweaters and blankets to lay on the floor.

“There’s a gun.” Five said, picking it up and weighing it in his hands. “Looks like it was for hunting.”

“Do we need it?” Vanya asked, chewing her bottom lip nervously.

“It could be useful.” Ben shrugged, and Five nodded his agreement.

“Do you even know how to use it?” Vanya asked, sceptically.

“Of course.” Five said. “Dad taught all of us, in training.”

“Jesus Christ.” Vanya murmured, shaking her head.

“Where’s the pocket knife, Five?” Ben asked, drawing their attention away from the gun.

“Should be in my blazer pocket.” Five said, carefully placing the hunting rifle on the wagon.

They’d keep their uniforms, even though they’d long outgrown them, and they weren’t at all practical, just as a reminder.

“Why do you need the knife?” Vanya asked, as Ben checked all of the pockets.

He pulled it out, and grabbed one of the bottles of wine from the shelves, and began working it on the cork.

“So we can drink… this!” Ben said, as he managed to pop the cork out of the bottle neck.

“Oh, no.” Vanya said, carefully. “Maybe we shouldn’t—”

“Aww, come on Van.” Five said. “It’ll be fun.”

“I thought the apocalypse wasn’t supposed to be fun?” Vanya said, raising her eyebrows and crossing her arms over her chest.

Five rolled his eyes. “Okay, I walked right into that one.”

“Are you in, or not?” Ben asked, looking at his sister.

She sighed. “Fine, but if either of you throw up I’m not dealing with it.”

Five and Ben shared a grin, as Vanya moved to sit next to them.

Five took the bottle first, snatching it from Ben’s hands and taking a big swig. He screwed up his face, but still had another sip. As he raised it to his lips for a third time, Ben swatted his hands away, taking the bottle back. Vanya took it last, and took a small sip. It tasted bitter, vinegary even, but it was probably past its best, if alcohol had a best by date, like everything else in this wasteland, but she took another sip, anyway.

Vanya wasn’t sure how long it took for alcohol to set in, but she assumed it couldn’t be too long. Their father had always ranted about it, whenever he caught Klaus with a bottle of something that he just happened to get his hands on, and they were all forced to listen into his lectures, something that Klaus would apologise profusely about afterwards, but wouldn’t stop him from doing again, no matter Luther’s disapproving scowl. She knew that it had heavier effects, depending on your size and what you’ve been eating recently, which the answers, for all three of them, were ‘pretty short’ and ‘almost nothing’. It was kind of ironic, really, that the three of them were the shortest, cascading in height as well as number order.

“What do you think happened to our siblings, before the apocalypse?” Vanya asked. “Like, life wise.”

“I hope Klaus stopped doing drugs.” Ben said, quickly. “And drinking.”

“Do you think they left the house?” Five asked. “Like, after we left?”

“I hope so.” Vanya sighed. “But Luther probably didn’t.”

“And if Luther didn’t, Allison probably didn’t.” Ben added.

“Diego would’ve gotten out, just to spite Luther.” Five said.

“And Klaus, well, Klaus…” Vanya began.

“Klaus was probably on the streets.” Ben finished.

They were silent, for a moment.

“Oh, god, I miss them.” Five said.

“Aww, you do care.” Vanya smiled, turning to look at her brother.

“Shut your mouth.” Five scowled, but there was a glimmer of a smile on his face, turning back to the bottle in his hands and taking another sip.

“Do you think—” Ben began, before sighing loudly. “That they looked for us?”

Vanya and Five, sitting on either side of him were silent for a few moments.

“Klaus might have.” Vanya said, quietly. “Looked for you, I mean.”

Five nodded his agreement. “You were closest, weren’t you?”

Ben nodded, slowly. “I guess. I never really spent much time with the others.”

“Allison braided my hair, once.” Vanya said. “But I think she just felt sorry for me, after you’d all gotten to spend a day doing press stuff.”

“The press stuff sucked.” Ben said, bitterly. “It all did. You were lucky you missed out, on missions and training and…” He trailed off.

“I didn’t feel very lucky.” Vanya said, softly. “I hardly spoke to you, and I missed out on everything.”

“All the stuff we did was shit, anyway.” Five said. “What kind of dickhead gives 12 year olds tattoos?”

“But you all had tattoos.” Vanya said. “And you all got to train together, and you all got to go on missions, and you all got to do interviews, and… oh, the portraits were the worst. It’s just like he was flaunting it in my face, and the whole time he knew. He knew that I had powers, and I could have been in any of the portraits, or on the missions, or on the front cover of the latest edition of ‘TeenWeekly’.” She sighed loudly, passing the bottle back to Ben.

“We can give you a tattoo, if you want.” Ben volunteered, and Vanya couldn’t tell if he was joking or not.

“And we can have a family portrait, as soon as we get home.” Five said. “That’s what we’ll do. But first, we’ll trash dad’s study.”

“Why?” Vanya asked.

“Because I don’t like him, very much.” Five said, his words slurring slightly.

“I think you’ve had enough of that.” Vanya said, taking the bottle out of his hands and placing it on the ground.

“No, Van!” He whined, grabbing the bottle back and laying his head back against the wall, shutting his eyes. “Do you think we’ll ever get home?”

Vanya and Ben looked at each other, for a split second.

“I’m sure you can figure out the equations.” Vanya said, cautiously.

“But… what if I can’t, and then we’re stuck here forever and it’s all my fault.” Five said, opening his eyes again. Vanya and Ben could both tell that he was worried.

“Then we’re stuck here.” Ben shrugged. “I’d rather live a shitty life here with you guys, than die trying to get back.”

“Really?” Five asked, looking at his brother seriously. “You mean that?”

Ben nodded, seriously.

“Are we your favourite siblings?” Vanya asked.

Ben nodded again. “Can you imagine being stuck here with any of the others?”

Vanya and Five both laughed.

“Luther would probably have already kidnapped your powers and time traveled back, himself.” Vanya said, kicking Five’s foot lightly. “And Diego would have killed whoever he was stuck with, by now.”

“Allison would have rumoured us constantly, ‘cause they’d be no one else for her to do it to.” Five continued. “And we’d have to hide the painkillers from Klaus.”

“Do you reckon Allison had a kid?” Ben asked, suddenly. “She’d be a good mum.”

“You’re not suggesting that...” Five began, before deciding not to finish his sentence.

“What?” Ben asked, confused.

Five only managed to get one word out before he began to laugh. “Luther…”

Vanya and Ben groaned. “Oh, god, Five!”

Five only continued to laugh.

“That was not what I was saying, and you know it.” Ben scolded.

“Do I, though?” Five asked, leaning into Ben’s side as he took another sip from the bottle.

They fell silent, sitting in their own thoughts, their heads spinning slightly, not used to the alcohol.

“Do you think the universe hates us?” Five asked, suddenly. “Or maybe it’s god. Maybe god hates us.”

“What are you talking about?” Vanya asked, leaning forward to squint her eyes at him.

“Think about it.” Five said, turning sideways and laying over his siblings legs so he was looking up at them. “We’re stuck in the apocalypse, and there’s not much food, or drink, and I don’t think we’ll ever go home.”

“Nah.” Ben said, shifting his legs slightly. “I don’t think the universe can hate anyone. I think we’re just idiots.”

“Different kinds of idiot, though.” Vanya corrected, her words slurring slightly. “Five’s stubborn idiot, and we’re just nice idiots. That’s why we’re here.”

“I’m glad you're nice idiots.” Five said. “‘Cause otherwise I’d probably go crazy.”

The years go on, and every winter they move back to the wine cellar, and in the summers they retreat back to the library. It became something of a tradition, move to the cellar as soon as there’s snow, unpack and drink. As the years wore on, though, it got less and less enjoyable. The wine turned even more bitter, and the novelty of what they referred to as ‘apocalypse Christmas’ wore off. In the springtime, though, flowers and greenery began to bloom around the cracks in the pavement, and peek out from under piles of rubble.

As the years go on, the possibility of getting home seems further and further away, even after the days that Five spends scribbling desperately into a notebook, the walls, a charred book, until his hands are black with ink and Vanya and Ben have to physically drag him away. He becomes obsessed with finding a solution, determined to get home.

As the years go on, The Horror, deep inside Ben’s stomach, grows more and more restless, after not having anything to kill for years, and it becomes a struggle to keep it inside. So on those nights, they don’t sleep, instead sit, wrapped tightly in blankets, Ben sandwiched between them, and they talk, keep him distracted, because it’s all they can do.

As the years go on, Vanya struggles to learn to control her power. It’s unpredictable, and she’s honestly a little scared of it, so she tries to keep as calm as possible, knowing her emotions set it off. And when she’s particularly sad, or scared, she’ll distance herself from her brothers and spend the time somewhere, where if something happens, they’ll be safe. Because it’s happened before, and the heavy rubble could cause a serious injury, if she makes it fly.

Food becomes scarcer and scarcer, and they move to half-rations, then quarter-rations, until they’re hardly eating, only when extremely necessary. And one day, Five catches a cockroach, for some miracle reason they managed to survive whatever killed the human race, and suggested they eat it, so they do, trying not to gag as they force it down their throats.

But they have good days, too. When they’ll sit in the shade of the library, discussing nothing in particular, sometimes what they miss the most (coffee, music, books) or if they could eat anything, what would it be (peanut-butter-marshmallow-sandwich, mum’s chicken schnitzel, those jelly donuts from Griddy’s) and that’s the closest they get to normality. But they don’t mind, really.

They do mind, they mind a lot.

  
  


According to the tally of days and years, that now fills at least half the notebook, they’re 34 when she arrives.

30 was kind of a special age, because that’s when their siblings died, when they were thirty. In a twisted kind of way, they’re not really all the same age, anymore.

She’s so different, and stands out in the disastrous landscape. Her hair is blonde, and curled, her face clean and black outfit crisp. In one hand, she’s gripping a briefcase, and she lifts the other to wave at them.

She looks so different to the three of them, hair greasy and roughly cut, faces dirty and sunburnt, wearing slightly too small brown hiking clothes.

And she’s real. Isn’t she?

At the first sign of movement, they all leap to their feet. Five’s hands are on the gun, and he’s pointing it at the woman, finger on the trigger, squinting at her through the lens.

“Is she… real?” Vanya’s voice is barely a whisper.

“I think so.” Ben mutters, back.

Five doesn’t take his eyes off her.

“Who are you?” Vanya calls, sounding braver than she feels.

“Oh, you don’t need to worry about that, not yet anyway.” The woman says, stepping closer.

“Take one more step and I shoot you.” Five growls. They know his warning is real.

The woman stops.

“What do you want?” Ben asked.

“To offer you a job.” The woman answers.

A job? Why would they want a job? They’re stuck in the apocalypse, for god's sake.

“Well, to offer Five a job, I don’t really care about you two.” She continues, geustering vaguely towards Ben and Vanya.

“How do you know my name?” Five demands, the gun still trained on her.

“Oh, I know a lot more than just your name.” The woman says, her voice clear and smooth. “Back at the commission, we’ve all heard about your time traveling adventure. You’re a regular celebrity.”

“What do you mean?” Vanya called out. “What’s the commission?”

The woman started, as if she’d forgotten that Vanya and Ben were still there. “My organisation. We’re impressed with your work, Five, and would like to offer you a job.”

Five doesn’t respond, waiting for the woman to elaborate.

“We oversee, and manage the space-time continuum. Our main job is to make sure that all events that are supposed to happen, happen. To do this, we have agents ready to travel through time and to eliminate anyone that poses a threat to our job.” The woman explains. “And your ability to travel through time, without a briefcase, is, well, simply put, quite astounding.”

“Why do you want me to work for you?” Five asked.

“Do you really want to be stuck here for the rest of your short, short life?” The woman asks. “Working for us, you could travel wherever you want, whenever you want.”

“What’s the catch?” Five asked.

“There is no catch, except that you have to be prepared to kill whoever we tell you to.”

Vanya and Ben’s jaws drop. She couldn’t be serious, could she?

“What about them?” Five asks, pointing to his sibling with his head, his hands still in the gun. “What happens to them?”

Five wasn’t really considering this, was he?

“Do you really care?” The woman crows. “They are nothing compared to you, you have unbelievably useful powers.”

“Of course I care.” Five snaps. “If I take the job, what happens to them?”

The woman sighs. “I suppose we could come to some sort of agreement, where they get to live.”

“No. We work out the agreement now.” Five said, through gritted teeth. “And there’s no loopholes.”

The woman sighs again. “Fine.”

“You don’t touch them, they don’t have to kill anyone, and they get to stay with me.” Five bargained, a look of determination on his face. “And no loopholes.”

The woman sighed again. “Your loyalty is disgusting, but I suppose it could be arranged.”

“Can it be arranged or not?” Five snarled.

“We have ourselves a deal.” The woman said, and she stepped forwards to shake Five’s hand.

Five lowered the gun.

“No, Five.” Vanya said, quickly. “Don’t do it.”

Five turned back towards his siblings, a forlorn expression on his face. “You’ll be safe, though.”

“No, no.” Ben said. “We’re happy to stay here, don’t take the deal.”

“It’s okay.” Five said. “They won't be able to hurt you.”

“No, Five.” Vanya said, her voice taking a pleading tone. “You can’t do it.”

And it was so similar to the day that got them stuck in this mess for the first time. With Vanya and Ben begging him not to go, except before Five was just stubborn, and now he’s doing it for them.

Five lowered the gun, and took the woman’s hand, shaking it before dropping it again.

The woman picked up the briefcase, flicking the clasps. There is a flash of blue, and then they’re all gone, spinning through space and time. Their last glimpse of the apocalypse, their home for the past 20 or so years, a hurried blur.

It’s hard to know how long they, well Five, really, worked for the Temps Commission. Ben and Vanya spent countless days following him around, spending aimless days in the commissions foyer, ignoring the idle chatter of the other workers. There’s always someone who wants to know about their time in the apocalypse, a few who want to know about their time in the umbrella academy, but Ben and Vanya don’t want to answer any of their questions. They spend the day together, sitting with Five on his lunch break.

And just like the day they first landed in the apocalypse, they fought, viciously and unkindly, until Five quietly whispered ‘no more fighting’ their mantra since their first day. So they made up, and accepted it.

For the first few weeks, Five did nothing but apologize, but Ben and Vanya had long since forgiven him. They’d both do the exact same thing.

They went with him on every single assignment, shutting their eyes and looking away when he had to pull the trigger. Vanya and Ben had spent the first few assignments, offering to do it for him, to do it with him, but he refused.

And the days turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months, and the months turned into years. The days were all the same, monotonous and repetitive.

And then, they were on an assignment in some part of America, in some timeline, Vanya and Ben had given up trying to understand it years ago, when they were standing behind a white picket fence, the small ham radio crackling to life, Five standing with his gun pointed at some new innocent person, he turned to his siblings in shock. Quickly handing the gun off to Vanya, who held in awkwardly, he pulled the notebook out of his pocket and began to scribble on a spare page.

“I’ve got it!” He cried, his face lighting up. “We can go home.”

“What?” Vanya and Ben cry, in sync.

“The equation.” Five said, again. “I worked it out.”

“What about your contract?” Ben asked, carefully.

“Screw the contract.” Five said, sticking the notebook back into his pocket. “We can go back home, and stop the apocalypse.”

“Okay.” Vanya said, but she felt a lot more excited. “Let’s do it.”

So they do it.

Standing the same way they did the day they first arrived in the apocalypse, Five standing between them, and it works.

A portal, blue and flashing, appears.

They look at it unsurely, as a fire extinguisher bounces out of it.

“I guess it works.” Ben shrugs.

And they step forwards, together.

It’s like the skin is being pulled off their bones, as they push through the barricade, eventually reaching a breaking point, and falling, screaming to the ground.

Getting up and brushing themselves off, they glance around. They’re in a courtyard, but it’s not just any courtyard, it’s their old backyard.

They turn to each other, in excitement, because they did it, they really did it!

And then they realise it. They look thirteen again.

“What the hell happened?” Ben cries, as he glances around, finally noticing their siblings, staring at them.

“Does anyone else see little numbers Five, Six and Seven, or is it just me?” A man, who could really only be Klaus, asks.

Shit.


End file.
